Book Corner 2023.13

by Peggy Ornstein

Basically, this woman tries all of my hobbies.

Specifically, she shears, cards, spins, dyes, and knits “the world’s ugliest sweater.”

She does this during pandemic times – and megadrought times. I can’t believe she undertook dyeing with a drought going on – surely negates all her other attempts at being a socially conscious crafter.

There’s way too much digression. For example, a chapter on indigo treats us to two pages on Joni Mitchell’s BLUE album. I don’t like when books do this – purport to be about a certain topic, then stray. I didn’t sign up to read about your affinity for Joni Mitchell or what you did during the pandemic or your family. I signed up to read about shearing, spinning, and dyeing.

So, sticking to the topics at hand:

Shearing isn’t very popular as a lifestyle choice because there are “many other ways to make a living that don’t require bending over for eight hours a day while an ungulate kicks you in the face.” Well put! In another blast of the reality of shearing, a sheep comments on her technique by letting loose a “gigantic mound of poop pellets” during the process. Shearing: well captured. Onward!

Carding and spinning chapters weren’t so interesting, so let’s skip to the dyeing. Acid dyes for home use might as well not exist; Author seems to think she has to do natural dyeing. Thus, the reader “might notice I mention yellow a lot.” Confirmed: trying to dye with natural materials you find in your immediate environment means you had better like yellow. Natural dyeing: spot-on! Next!

Knitting. Author undertakes a sweater even though she knows it would have been wiser to choose a shawl or cowl pattern. One small reason she chose the unwiser path is that she admits to “never, under any circumstances, wearing either of those garments.” Yes – let’s face it. Shawls and cowls are just not normal wardrobe options. They’re things knitters like because they are easy and/or use little yarn.

I was put off by Author’s mathophobia. Mathophobia is tiring to read about. “Even writing the phrase ‘set of ratios’ gives me a headache.” Po widdle bebby. Math is hard!!

BUT… Author wins my love again when she correctly identifies the kinship of knitting with programming! Knitting is coding – “with knits and purls replacing the standard binary 0s and 1s.” Knitting patterns are programs (this is me talking). Garbage in, garbage out. Follow the steps, get a repeatable result.

Certainly could not resist this book and hope it encourages just one person out there to try their hand at – almost said ‘sheep-to-shawl’ crafting, but let’s make it ‘sheep-to-article-you’ll-actually-wear’ crafting.